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2016: It’s all about me

2016, it’s all about me. Sound a bit selfish? Abso-fucking-lutely. But there’s more to it than that; it’s about looking at things from a different perspective, making the most of the year ahead and doing things that make me happy, and that I enjoy. Not because I feel obliged. Life is too short to make other people happy by making yourself unhappy and I must accept that I can’t do everything.

For me, 2016 is about being honest, liberating myself from the constraints of the ‘must do because you should do’ and being mindful. A happy me, generally, means the people around me are happy too. That all sounds a bit gushy and deep, but I’m keen to tackle this year in a different way; I’m bored with the same old shit approach. So… I’m writing my New Year blog post in February…

Collapsed gingerbread house

This year I’ll say no to the kids if they ask to build a gingerbread house. Here’s why.

1) I’m saying no and I won’t feel bad about it

I’m actually pretty good at this anyway, but this year I’ll be better. No more agreeing to go to works dos/family parties/events if I won’t enjoy them/don’t have time/can’t afford it/or just don’t feel up for it. After reading this Guardian article, it reinforced something I already knew: it’s okay to say no to things and not feel bad about it. I can’t make that leaving do but best of luck in your new venture. I can’t make the family party but send love and hugs to Uncle Bob. I can’t make training tonight but I’ll see you at the game tomorrow. I’m not up for that cinema trip, but maybe next time. And you don’t even need to give a reason, just saying no is fine. I’m saying goodbye to obligation and it feels liberating.

 2) Only working for me, myself and I

No more crappy freelance. I’m being harsh here, freelance isn’t crappy but helping other people out leaves no time for me. It means that my notepad full of ideas and personal projects get left right there in the notepad and never put into practice. Whenever I get a surge of motivation I’d think ‘Gah, I don’t have time, I need to finish something for someone else.’ As 2016 is all about me, not taking on anything outside of my day job (apart from point number 4 below) frees up time to focus on these projects. No more displacement activities, or whatever you want to call them, means I can crack on with my ‘me’ projects.

Robyn Bateman3) Making an effort

Last year was about family really and I think, like a lot of parents, I let a little bit of me go. This year, while time is and always will be an issue, I want to make the effort to wear earrings, paint nails, buy boots with heels instead of flats and trainers, and occasionally pop on some red lipstick (thanks to my Secret Santa!). They’re small things but they make a difference. I’m currently writing this post in knee-high boots… (not JUST boots, you sickos, I’m fully dressed!).

4) Return of the MA
The year I fell pregnant, I was part-way through an MA in Online Journalism with Birmingham City University. I was awarded a scholarship and supported by my employer; opportunities like that don’t come around every day to degree-less, non-academic bods like me.

I decided to interrupt study to enjoy the last months of pregnancy and birth of ‘Bean Child’. And I use the term ‘enjoy’ loosely.  I then popped out the Boy Child, endured a period of mania, lack of sleep and resettling into work. Now is my last chance to get on and finish the MA and I’d be an absolute idiot to ditch it now. Hard work is ahead but it’ll be so rewarding and challenging. I know I’ll love it, moan about it, get excited, swear a lot and other contradictions but it has to be done. I work at The Open University and see, firsthand, the amazing educational achievements of our students who complete qualifications while spinning many plates. And I see their proud families, their new careers, their sense of self-achievement and I want me a slice of that. Distance learning makes it possible and BCU have been really accommodating, putting more flex into flexible so I can work at my own pace. When I get my arse in gear, you can read about my progress here.

Cocker Spaniel Ralphie in trainers5) Pass the endorphins
I’ve started running. It should be noted that I am not a runner, and I don’t really like it that much. However, given time and budget constraints lack of time and cold, hard cash (MUST shake off the work jargon!), running can be done anywhere, at anytime and is completely free. I walk the dog every other evening anyway (me and hubby take turns) so I might as well run a bit, even though Ralphie’s not so keen because he likes to stop and sniff. I now say I’m taking him for a drag, not a walk.

Also, and this is important, I’m setting limited expectations (there I go with the work jargon again). What I mean is, just doing it is enough – the time/distance/pace/calorie burn etc doesn’t matter. I’m not working my way up to run 5km and I’m fully accepting of my run/walk/run/walk approach. I can only run in short bursts and that’s okay because it’s better than nothing. And if it gets easier and I can go for longer, great. But if it doesn’t and I can’t then that’s okay too. Secretly, I’m kind of enjoying it. I feel great and smug that I’m excercising beyond my weekly netball match and thanks to my new running trainers (Christmas motivational present from hubby, modelled by Ralphie over here ——->), I’m positively bouncing off those pavements. Well, almost.

6) Recognising those who support me
Being truly selfish requires help. And there are lots of people I could mention, I thank them all, but there’s one who needs naming. Richard Bateman. Our time together has been a whirlwind of romance, marriage, kids and juggling all the things we love to do. And it’s because we’re really good at the sharing, supporting, balancing act of being responsible adults that I’m able to do all of the above as well as raise two children and get to work on time Richard and Robyn Bateman(dressed and washed, too). For me, the juggling of our family life is split between us and I recognise this is not the norm: mums often play the lead role and make more personal sacrifices when it comes to raising a family. We are not traditional in that sense and take an equal role in family, work and social stuff. And it’s not easy. It’s not easy for me that the kids often run to their dad when they’re ill, instead of me, or for him to manage running a business when he’s expected to be flexible. Yay for us!

So, here’s to tackling 2016 in a different way. But I’m not totally selfish… if you’re stuck in a rut, I can offer you this: read Thrive. It’s an eye-opener (how to reprioritise and emasure success in different ways) and this book by Sarah Knight, if for nothing more than the fact is has a swear word in the title.

Surrounded by women bloggers: my day at Cybher!

I have never in my life been to a conference in which mothers breast feed babies while guest speakers talk, undeturbed, about their area of expertise. And that pretty much sums up the relaxed atmosphere at Cybher on Saturday – the UK’s only conference for female bloggers – in which 300 were in attendance.

Throw in free leather satchels, a constant supply of coffee and cookies, some talented and inspiring speakers and lots of happy, smiling faces, and you can’t go far wrong.

9am to 6pm is a long day at a conference for me and I’ve always had enough by 4pm – especially given my 6.30am alarm call to trog to London on the train with my sidekick for the day. But I was wide awake and 6pm and returned home to Milton Keynes feeling inspired.


Cookies and coffee and handbags Podcasting session with The High Tea Cast Caz Walton's Cybher badge

Caz and an AVG cupcake Taking notes at Cybher Cybher conference screen in the ballroom


I’ve never attended a conference where I’m not ‘working’ it – and Cybher was no different. My latest MA project on multimedia covers the conference, the stories behind some of the guest speakers and how blogs can change people’s lives.

So I had one eye on the conference and the other on my project but, to be honest, this assignment has been a lot of fun and one thing is clear – bloggers are talented, powerful and most of all, lovely. Not concerned about competing with each other, they’re all happy to share their experiences, their tricks of the trade and their expertise. Very refreshing!

So, enough from me, go check out for indepth interviews with some of the speakers as well as a round up of Cybher in pictures, text and audio.

My day at the Guardian Open Weekend

Author’s note: I wrote most of this post the day after the event and failed to finish and publish it. So it’s a belated report of the Guardian Open Weekend but better late than never, eh?

I’ve just been wracking my brain on the premise that this blog post would start with the highlight of my day at the Guardian Open Weekend. And cupcakes popped into my head. A stall set up just outside the Guardian’s office on York Way sold cute little cupcakes emblazoned with the Guardian logo (in icing, no less) and they were yummers. But that wasn’t the highlight of the weekend, I’m just… Obesessed. With. Cake.

It was great for The Guardian to open its doors for the weekend and let us civilians in to poke around and be the ones asking the questions for a change. Not only could we glimpse the offices over the shoulders of burly bouncers who stopped us straying to where we shouldn’t, we also indulged in some great talks. There were loads of sessions I’d like to have attended and many weren’t targeted at media types. The jewellery making session – they got pliers to play with! –  appealled but I plumped for sessions on careers (very topical in my workplace right now), how to make a video (scores points and work and for the MA), how to publish your own book (a blatant ad for but interesting in case I (when) can’t get published the traditional way) and a talk about how the Guardian’s gone multimedia (interesting, relevant and showcased the Guardian’s great work).

This was a two-day event but my buddy Angie and I attended on Saturday only. So, while Ang sloped off to attend a session on gender and equality – and learned the word ‘pinkification’ – I attended “How to change your career’ led by Richard from

I love career change stories, I find them really uplifting and they remind me that life’s journey doesn’t have to be straight and narrow. One of the audio case studies played during the session was from a chap called Hugo, and it lingers in my mind still.  “Changing career has given me licence to be the same person in work as I am outside of work.” That’s what I want.

Session leader Richard shared his own career change – from international corporate to social entreprenuer – and his body language changed dramatically as he did. The anger and loathing of his old job showed through his tensed fingertips, tort face and you could see the inner rage come out in his words. Moving on to talk about how he made the change and his body relaxed, he lit up and spoke with passion.

It was interesting, to me at least, that there were at least three journalists in the room (all looking for a new career?) in what was a small ish session comprising no more than 30 people. One young woman was working as a trained lawyer didn’t want a career in law; and that the other session leader Sarah is still trying to find out what she wants to do and is embarking on a portfolio career, trying lots of different things until she finds something that fits.

So, to summarise, Careershifters recommends a five step formula:

  1. Get committed (decide to make a change and be proactive about making it happen)
  2. Get to know yourself (look at what switches you on, not what’s on your CV. Define your ideal career ingredients and take the trial and error approach  – attend classes or workshops to see what you like doing)
  3. Explore your options (use your networks to search for opportunities and set up brief meetings with people rather than firing off a CV. Decide if the strategic (planned) approach is for you; whether you want to ‘jump off the cliff’ and straight from one career to another or the parachute approach which is somewhere between the two.
  4. Make the change (put yourself amongst the right people, get the skills you need, manage your finances)
  5. Stay the course (fear of finances, fear of failure, fear of what friends and family think? Don’t let that put you off)

Session number two was about how to make a video, led by the accidental comedy duo of John Domokos and Laurence Topham. Clearly unrehearsed and unprepared these two characters – Laurence the chatty, hyperactive one and John the demure, straight-talking one – flipped from offering advice to showing clips to demo-ing the iPhone and taking questions.

All Guardian reporters – including those from a print-only background – will be trading their Blackberry for an iPhone soon in order to capture video on the fly. They gave some great examples of video interviews and mini films caught on the iPhone and how you can even edit from your smartphone.

In between trying/failing to establish who was lading the session, the pair offered some great tips on lighting, positioning, angles etc before aiming to split us into teams and briefing us to gallivant off and collect vox pops, wide angle shots and general views (GVs) so they could edit it together for a video report on the Guardian Open Weekend. And when they sent us off on our mission, it was only then they realised they needed to get the footage off us, somehow, in order to edit and use it. It was a last minute scramble to hand over an email address to send clips, and the session ended in semi confusion.

Ang and I didn’t take up the video challenge, which clashed with lunch on a noisy side street and our following two sessions – plus a browse around the event’s bookstore featuring the wares of Guardian authors – but this is what some of the others came up with..

We attended a session on how to publish your book which I was expecting to be about why you’d choose to self publish over battling for an agent and then a book deal in this day and age when the publishing industry is flagging. But nope, it was a blatant advert for, a company which helps you publish your own books, whether you’re aiming to be the next JK Rowling or wanting to create an album of photos for loved ones. A few people got up and left after 15 mins but we stuck it out to the end and it was actually interesting. There’s no need for me to fill you in though, you can head straight to for all the info.

Our day ended on very low comfy chairs listening to a handful of Guardian folk talking about how the company has gone multimedia. If you think the Guardian is just about a newspaper, you’d be very wrong, and they plough a lot of time and energy into creating awesome videos, including this incredibly moving and powerful animation; multimedia journalism at its best. They alsolaunched Streetstories, an audio-community-history project for the Kings Cross area.

It was a great day, I left knowing more about the Guardian and hopefully other folk did too. Plus the cupcakes were really rather tasty.

Five for Friday: Football and photographs

On Good Friday, hubby realised a dream and took his family to watch a Reading FC match in an executive box which he won in an auction. The run up to that auction was a very stressful time; my husband is a loyal Reading supporter and wasn’t planning on missing this opportunity.

So, we enjoyed a full stadium tour, a three-course meal and a tense game against Leeds United and their VERY vocal supporters. Aside from a top day out – and a very happy husband (at least once Reading were 2-0 up and they left it pretty late) – it was a chance for me to try out Instagram, a cool little app for snapping and sharing piccies, touching them up a bit and posting them to Facebook and Twitter etc. I love photography anyway but this app makes it more fun and I find myself longing for picture opportunities to crop up. Sometimes they don’t though, which is why I’ve ended up with a few pics of my bedside table and lamp. Hmm, not terribly exciting.

So here are a five Instagram piccies from the Madejski Stadium on Good Friday…

Reading FC ticketsReading FC pitchReading FC stadiumReading FC dugoutReading FC changing rooms

Cybher – meet and greet

cybher 2012 logo

I’m really chuffed and exciting to be attending Cybher 2012 in May, the first all inclusive female blogger event of its kind in the UK. Woo! Not only will I revel in excellent blog company, learn some new stuff and hopefully put faces to the Twitter names I’ve been following for some time, I may well cover the event as part of an assignment for my Masters. We’ll see. I’ll be popping along with my fellow blogging friend Carrie Walton and thoroughly looking forward to a day which celebrates the fact there are so many fabulous female bloggers out there.

So here’s my Cybher Meet and Greet post *waves to everyone*…


Name : Robyn Bateman (formerly the artist known as Robyn Slingsby)

Blog :

Twitter ID: @robynbateman
Height : 5ft 9ins
Hair : Mostly crap and not nearly thick enough for my liking, prompting underlying fear I’ll one day go bald. Currently cut in a lopsided bob which I’ve since learned is asymmetric.


Five things you should know about me…
1. When I was younger I wanted to be the female equivalent of Linford Christie and be an Olympic sprinter. I then wanted to be an author (and still do) and then a journalist (tick).

2. I used to be a newspaper reporter then editor and got nominated for the Midlands Media Awards Headline of the Year a couple of times, but didn’t win.

3. I have an 18-month-old Cocker Spaniel called Ralphie who I love to bits. And he even has his own website (created for one of my MA projects, refer to point 5)

4. I was born and bred in Shropshire which I fondly refer to as ‘The Shire’. I then lived in Leicester for a year or so and am now in Milton Keynes, which isn’t nearly as horrible as most people think it is.

5. I’m doing an MA in Online Journalism at Birmingham City University (via distance learning) and loving it. And Cybher may well form the basis for one of my assignments!


You can find out more about me by reading this blog (or my Journo Nest blog where I post about my studies) or by following me on Twitter.

If you would like to join the Cybher Meet and Greet, do a post and add it to the Linky here. Really looking forward to seeing you in May!

Oh, and if you already have your ticket make sure you grab your badge here.

It's all about dogs…

Dogs have been hitting the headlines this week… or should that be pawing? Either way, it’s only Tuesday and already this week I’ve listened to debates about dangerous dogs following the mauling of another wee child; semi-scientific reasoning behind why our four-legged friends might being psychic; bid farewell to my latest MA assignment which is very much doggy related; and digested the sad, sad news that my sister-in-law’s dog Dylan went to doggy heaven today.

The latter made me sad to the core; the death of a dog, no matter how expected, knocks you off your feet and it takes time to get over the loss of one of your family. So big love to Dylan up in doggy heaven.

Over to the dog-themed headlines: the first utterly ridiculous, the other no laughing matter.

So let’s deal with the silly first: psychic dogs. BBC Breakfast yesterday gave the seriously lightweight example of a dog escaping from his sitter and finding his way home on the exact day his owner flew back from a holiday. This doesn’t spell psychic to me, more coincidence. And if the dog had been psychic surely he would have ‘seen’ sense to stay put and wait for his owner to collect him and save a massive and dangerous trek home? Others agree with me.

I have no doubt that dogs have a sixth sense: how do they know when another dog passes by the house, even when the curtains are closed and they can’t see out the window? And that’s pretty clever. But they’re not psychic, surely?

Robyn and Ralphie walking by canalRalphie knows when he’s about to get a walkies, not because he reads my mind but because he’s cottoned on to our family routine. And he recognises the out of routine walks because I might put my shoes on or go to the cupboard where his dog lead is kept. Dogs are clever and they pick up on cues, this doesn’t mean they’re psychic.

The second dog-themed headline of the week is much more serious: another dog owner charged under the Dangerous Dogs Act and another child left with permanent scarring, no doubt physical and emotional.

One of the guests on BBC Breakfast, the mother of a child lost to a dog attack, suggested that all dogs be muzzled, in public and at home, when around children under 12. The second guest, from The Dogs Trust, flagged up all the good that dogs do; helping people, guiding the blind, saving lives and offering companionship to the elderly or lonely.

What they both agreed on is awareness and responsible dog ownership and training. I’d bet my bottom dollar that if we hadn’t taken Ralphie to training classes he’d be running rings around us right about now. Instead, he knows he’s at the bottom of the pack and that he has to behave.

Ralphie’s a cocker spaniel and his forever swinging tail is the most dangerous thing about him but he has snapped at other dogs, never a human.

We’ve met dog owners on walks who don’t have friendly dogs and recognise the fact their pet doesn’t like other people or dogs and might snap or bark. But they pre-warn us before we pass by,  so we can keep Ralphie out of harm’s way if he’s off the lead. Or they’re muzzled. And that’s fine; I don’t expect temperamental dogs not to be out and about, they need walking like any other, but it’s more about the owner and how they react. And having the control over their pets to deal with a situation should something go awry.

What did shock me was one cyclist’s extreme views in dealing with dogs as I caught part of Radio 2’s lunch time slot with Jeremy Vine yesterday. He had clearly been pestered by bicycle-chasing dogs for many years and taken extreme offence to it. He listed pointing at dogs and shouting them, hitting them with sticks, kicking them in the genitals and punching them in the head as recommended tactics to avoid being attacked.

What a dog trainer then pointed out was this man was doing everything possible to provoke an attack, his list clearly illustrating deep misunderstanding of our canine friends. And they are our friends, for the most part.